What to do when your husband won't lead spiritually

In many marriages, the wife feels disappointed, angry, resentful, resigned, and confused about what to do with a husband who seems spiritually absent or is unwilling to lead his family toward Christ.

If you find this to be true in your marriage, the solution is not to nag or criticize in an attempt to force your husband to fulfill his responsibility, neither is it wise to give up and resign yourself to having to take the lead..

Instead the answer lies in letting go of control of the situation and allowing God to work on His son (your husband).  While this may seem like you will just sit back and wait, there is something you can take control of: yourself. 

1 Peter 3:1 says: "In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words" New Living Translation

In order to encourage your husband’s faith you must first be that example of one obeying The Word. As we passionately pursue God through Jesus Christ and recognize that relationship as being THE most important we gain truth and insight from His Word.  During the tough times, we are able to complain and cry out to Him.  When life is going well we dance, sing and rejoice thanking Him.  In short, when we seek to know and follow Him we are comforted, guided and taught by the Holy Spirit living inside us.

Ok, so you want something else...

Gratitude.  One of the things men thrive on is a feeling of appreciation when we actively notice and express gratitude for our blessings and the many gifts God has given us in our husband, it will change our attitude towards him. Be intentional about looking for things you appreciate about your husband – what he’s doing right and then write them down in a gratitude journal and share them with him. Hebrews 3:13 tells us to “encourage one another daily as long as it is called today so that none of you may be hardened by sin and deceitfulness.”

I am not suggesting this as a subtle tool to use for control, but as a true act of loving your husband as you vowed on your wedding day that you would do until your last day.  These are his actions, words or behaviors that you show genuine appreciation for because you really appreciate them.  This is likely to be a marked difference to what he is used to from you if he is used to receiving criticism...or helpful pointers.  As you do this with an expectation that through your act of love God is touching your husband it will also help you feel happier.  

What you focus on expands in your life so the more you focus on what you appreciate rather than his shortcomings that you wish would change, the more of those positive things you will experience.  

In conclusion the idea is to love him, bless him, and enjoy him for the things about him that you delight in, and all the while Praying and Modeling what you hope he will become for me.

Please share your biggest take away from this in our free Facebook group.   Click here to join  The group is a supportive community where I share more ideas so join us in our Wealthy Wives Club Facebook Group Click here to join

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Until next time

Love me, Love you!

Donnamaree

How to Improve your Marriage

PHOTO by Shona Harris

I can guess that whenever there's been conflict in your marriage you can easily spot what it is your husband could have done differently.  Am I correct?

Well, I am challenging you today to claim your own part.  Are you open to stop the blame and work on you?  It means taking responsibility!

If your goal is to have a life-long satisfying marriage … you have to take personal responsibility for the health and well-being of your relationship.

I believe that I must own the fact that as an individual in this marriage, I am responsible for the good, the bad, and any ugly that is present in my marital union. 

I'll be honest … I know we all want to blame our spouses (or somebody or something else) for the problems in our marriages.  I did the same for years and truly believed that to be the truth until I was presented with another possibility.  I was asked if i was open to the possibility that most of the problems in my marriage relationship actually started with me.  Not my husband… but me! 

Marriage expert Paul David Tripp says: “I am my biggest marital problem!” 

The fact is … no marriage will ever be stronger than the weaker spouse.  

Therefore, can you see why you can’t have the best marriage … unless you are the best wife?  So, both you and your husband need to work at becoming the best “you” possible … to being the man and woman, God wants you to be; and to have the best marriage possible!

Becoming the best involves answering the hard questions like: 

What behaviors do I know I am doing which is causing issues in our marriage?  What am I blaming my spouse for?

How have I contributed to the weaknesses in our relationship?

This will not only help you strengthen your marriage, in my experience, the answers to these have uncovered deep rooted issues to resolve.  

You say you have already started to change but your husband is not changing?

I know.

We cannot change anyone but ourselves.

Right now, I encourage you to keep on keeping on because it only takes one spouse who is willing to work toward being happily married for the whole marriage to change.

This is a process … it is completely your responsibility … don't grow weary in doing good.

If you want a better marriage … focus on becoming a better you!

Please share your biggest take away from this in our free Facebook group.   Click here to join  

The group is a supportive community where I share more ideas so join us in our Wealthy Wives Club Facebook Group Click here to join

Visit my Facebook page here 

During 2017 we have been getting together for monthly Mastermind sessions so find the information on dates and times in the Facebook group.

Dating for Married Couples

It has been proven that millionaires not only put in the work but they also prioritise time for play.  With deadlines and hectic schedules, it is easy for you to encroach on your play time to just get that one last important task accomplished for the day...

In the wealthy Wives Club I encourage the ladies to observe Self-Care Saturday.  We all know we cannot pour anything from an empty cup so it is important to fill yourself up by taking care of yourself.

The same is true for your marriage so enjoying dates with your husband will do wonders for your relationship.  Whether you stay at home or go out, that time of being together in loving connection is priceless.

I invite you to click and join our Wealthy Wives Club Facebook Group

Tayo and I watched the TV Series Prison Break together and absolutely loved spending that time together.  Now that it's over, if you have any suggestions of another one we may enjoy, I'd love you to leave them in the comments below.

With a change in his working patterns, we have recently been havig lunch dates which have been amazing as we are both wide awake and in a much better state than some of the date night evenings we have attempted.

Seen as we are both interested in some of the same authors, I'm going to suggest a Book Club where we read the same book and then have our own book club night (as suggested by the author of the these 30 Date Ideas.

Have a look, think of your own and comment below to share your favorites.

Enjoy those dates!

Love me, Love you!
Donnamaree

Tony Robbins - Manage Your Emotions || Change Everything In Your Life Wi...

The video below is less than 8 minutes.  It features Tony Robbins sharing the importance of emotional fitness.

It's simple common sense about our needs.

So, why are we not seeing them in our lives?

Click to join the Wealthy Wives Club on Facebook for a safe place of sharing and support as you improve your emotional fitness.

Enjoy the video by clicking Here and leave your comments below.

Love me, love you!

Donnamaree


Click here for the video